Marital Bliss

A few are blessed with marital bliss. The rest of them are destined to be single or separated. And a few are born under the good influence of the planets. They will have a better life. Others are sufferers. Nuclear families are a big problem today. Every male and female are under pressure to marry. For those whom marriage is not foretold, if you push them into marriage, it will end up in calamities. Astrologers and parents should understand this. They check only Mars's flaw and the seventh house in the horoscopes. Actually Mars is not the culprit for break up, other planets are equally responsible. Since Saturn is the Lord of birth and death it should be in the right place in the birth charts. In my horoscope Saturn is in the right house but my husband's is not and according to the Vedic he has a flaw of Mars. I had an early marriage, though we have a love-hate relation, it is going on. When it comes to selecting life partner one's own choice is better. Proper attraction may be possible in love marriages. Even love marriages will not work out if there are more planetary flaws in both horoscopes. All are not born to marry. I would like to mention a little about my family for example. I have experience of both joint and nuclear family. My grand father had a joint family where there were more than 20 members including brothers, sisters, cousins and children of married members living together and had a vast area of farm lands and house with a large plot. Now it is only a dream. In our joint family one or two had maried life, even it was short-lived. The rest of the members were single or separated. They spent their life without having any regrets and were happy with the children whom married members had. As far as I know there were no serious problems in the family except slight beckering. There were honest and dedicated servants and no daring robbers then. Even though the houses are not safe enough without proper bolts and locks we didn't have to fear robbery. But problems started when educated young members started migrating to ohter places seeking job. The house began empty and a few mebers who left there had difficulty in managing the farm and they partitioned off the ancestral property. Thus the joint family changed into nuclear families. Now I have a nuclear family in which I feel insecure. But I cannot go back to the past. Why I encourage joint family that there will be somebody to help if any family members have any problems and in old age. I cannot say joint family is totally problem-free. We cannot get rid of our negative emotions completely. So there will be friction. If family members have understanding it is better than nuclear families. It is difficult ot follow the joint family's routine and punctuality, such as get up, sleep and eat in time, no late nights, having meals together. But chances are fewer children get spoilt. Male members also will be disciplined and cultured. The family profession will be inherited generation by generation and members will get old and go one by one; their rebirth may take place, in this way the clan will go on. If family multiplies, houses are to be multiplied. If a house is to be built for every person there will not be place on this earth. If a couple have many children, one of them will be born under the planets' good influence. Other siblings can live with his or her support. Sibling rivalry like Ambani brothers are common nowadays. The problem is that elder brother has good influence, the younger one has not. And their birth stars have no compatibility. If brothers try to understand and help each other there will be no problem. The more we get selfish the more our problems pile up. But one is destined to leave the birth place, no one can help. Matriarchal system in Kerala is meant to protect women in the family, their children and to keep the bondagae of brothers and sisters. People from other states find it funny and make fun of it without knowing its value. Patriarchal system in India gives women hardship. Women have to leave their own home and a huge amount of dowry is needed to marry them off. This leads to torture, murder, suicides, female feticides and all that. This practice and problems will go on until we change. If a woman is divorced or become widow and if there are children she will have to struggle the rest of her life. She cannot get respect anywhere. In that case women need protection from their own family. It will help them to get over the emotional trauma that the divorce or widowhood causes. I write this regarding the fate of women I see daily.